TONYA

Mother, I am sorry, I never pick up
对不起妈妈，我从没接你的电话
Mmm-mhm
嗯。。
Because I'm afraid to disappoint
我只是怕让你失望
Ooh, oh, no
对不起
Oh, no
我不是不想你
And I've been feelin' like I don't matter how I used to
过去的事情我似乎已不再在意
And I've been feelin' like I don't matter how I used to
不再在意了
We were sat outside on the hardwood floor
我们曾坐在庭院的木地板上
With our feet in dirt, and our hearts in awe
脚底沾满泥巴，怀着敬畏之心
I be losin' sleep thinkin' 'bout missed calls
我为那些错过的来电而失眠
And I see the names circling our thoughts
那些名字一直在我脑海里浮现
And I think about if we lose it all
我在想 我是否失去了他们
And I turn to **** that you never want
我沾上了你唾弃的东西
Like the smoke, the drink, anything at all
尼古丁，酒精，所有烂东西
And I'll say again, sorry I don't call
我要再次道歉我没有回电给你
There's no money on my mind, but my money or my mind
我做这些不是为了钱
What's the first to fall?
但对金钱的渴望也让我讨厌自己
I never wanted this ****
我不想。。
Yeah
哎
And I've been feelin' like I don't matter how I used to
过去的事情我似乎已不再在意
And I've been feelin' like I don't matter how I used to
不再在意了
Sometimes it be so spot on it hurts
有时被瞄的太准 打的太疼
Like when Auntie couldn't decide
就像阿姨没法决定
Between going to work or church
去工作还是去礼拜
I've been in my feelings on an island in the dirt
我像是陷入了孤岛上的泥沼
I feel like brothers lie just so my feelings don't get hurt
我以为 听了兄弟的谎话会好受一点
I said, I'll try vacation, and I'll try to run away
我试着给自己放假，我试着让自己逃离
I deleted Facebook, I'll trade fame any day
我卸载了Facebook，我愿失去名声 回到过去
For a quiet Texas place and a barbecue plate
有个安静的地方，可以烧烤的地方（brockhampton在德州生活过一段时间）
I'll switch my place if that's good for you, is that good for you?
如果你想跟我交换身份，那就换吧，可别后悔
My ghost still haunt you, my life is I, Tonya
我的魂魄会缠着你，我的生活就像是《I,Tonya》（一位花样滑冰选手，她的经历被改编为电影于2017年上映）
A big eyed monster, only face to conquer
你会变成一只大眼怪，只能一直去战胜生活中的困难
I hated songs about fame 'cause that stuff meant nothin'
我讨厌关于名利的歌 就没啥意义
Until them headlines came, then first flight I'm stuckin'
然后这些歌就上了头条，我在飞机上惊得无法动弹
And maybe it means nothing
也许毫无意义
But I have to say I think about you often
但我还是要说我时常想起你
And if you want no part with me
如果你想跟我干架(应为And if you want a war with me)
I'll walk away, I know that I have wronged you
我会屈服 因为我曾辜负你
And maybe it means nothing
也许毫无意义
But I have to say I think about you often
但我还是要说我时常想起你
And if you want no part with me
如果你想跟我干架
I'll walk away, I know that I have wronged you
我会屈服 因为我曾辜负你
I took a plane to somewhere that I've never been
我飞往未知的地方
Too many times without my sister and my brother
太多次旅程 家人都不在我的身边
Dad or mother by my side but they're in spirit
但他们存在于我的灵魂之中
I always hear it, I know they feel it
我总能听到他们的声音 我知道他们明白我想着他们
My mom will always have these dreams that keep her up at night
我妈总是每晚担心我，难以入眠
I smoke to keep them all away and make use of the time
我抽烟是为了让家人讨厌我 远离我，来利用好自己的时间
I'm void of feelin'
我已经麻木了
The reasons I'm so out of touch, now start revealin'
我如此孤独的原因，现在开始显现
But I'm not ashamed, I'm not afraid of who I am
但我不会羞愧，我也不畏惧自己
Or how I trust my mental, yeah, it's not perfect
即使我的精神不健全我也会相信它
But I guess that's just the **** I'm into
我想这就是我热爱的生活
I fantasize about a time when everything was simple
我幻想过简单的生活
My shelter sheltered me from things I needed to commit to
我的家人们让我不做错事
The way it stands to me
他们永远站在我这边
A victim of Stockholm in my friendships and family
一个斯德哥尔摩患者的一边
What's costin' you time? What's the reason that you whine?
是什么在浪费你的时间？是什么让你抱怨？
What's in your wallet? Dead whites in mine
你的钱包里有什么？我的装有死去的白人
So sour, in this light of lime
洒满了石灰，都还是臭得要死(指那些种族主义者)
Daddy said "study or get that cash"
他说：“给我学习，不然就只能当个小偷”
Mommy said "your career ain't gon' last"
她说：“你成不了事”
Loose change, call a cab, move out their pad
所以抓把零钱，叫辆出租，离开他们的阴影之下
I just want a chance to move past my past
我只想抓住机会，逃离这残忍的过去
Don't think too fast, private jets still crash
但也别想太远了，喷气机也会坠毁
And I'll still fly coach, and I'll still hit a roach
至少我还能坐得起经济舱，我还打的死蟑螂
And I'll still see roaches at the crib where my folks at
我还看见他们的烂房子里有蟑螂乱爬
Touch your dreams 'fore you touch me and provoke a man
在你来惹毛我之前 先碰得到自己的梦想吧垃圾
(Somebody gonna have to tell the truth and I'm gonna tell it!)
总有人得出来说实话，我就来当那个人
I will (I will)
我会的
And I've been feelin' like I don't matter how I used to
我似乎快忘记了我的从前
How I, how I
我的从前...
Can I tell you how, Can I tell you now
我能告诉你吗..
How I, how I
我的从前...