Women Lose Weight

what a surprise
open your eyes
woman advisor
the name of this entertainement is
women lose weight
our first years of mariage everything was just great
but after two kids
and a weight gain factor
the fact is
now shes completely unattractive
look fat chicks
i dont mean to sound rude
i tell her nice hit the gym
and dont eat so much food
but no
your shallow
you need to run the course of unconditionnal love and so forth
but how if desires is not there
thats just a lamon
divorces, child support alamony payments
my unhappiness i doubt discourage
so hurry for an easier way out of this marriage
meanwhile my secretary june well groomed
when you gonna leave your wife
i tell her soon mommy soon i assume
or my destiny is blue
intrest only
the only thing left for me to do is to kill her
what a surprise
open your eyes
woman advisor
im gonna have to kill her
cause theres lots which imposes divorces
send her ass right to the morgue
kill her
what a surprise
open your eyes
woman advisor
im gonna have to kill her
cause theres lots which imposes divorces
send her ass right to the morgue
my place against all shanagans
kinda rammed in
knowin nothing about poison
and i cant swim
bad intentions pumpin
might as well become a nun
cut her lungs or the obvious robbery gone wrong
what the catch is do i have the nerve to dispatch this
who could i get to help me murder this fat chick
guess i have to play a dude robbin on wednesday
the day she usually goes food shopping
anyway long story short hit the side of her chrysler
sent her clean over the divider
"you bastard" she said as the wreck went tumblin down the hill
i thought "she has to be dead"
later on get a call
(from a) lieutenant morgue
(had me) leapin like a frog
we need you at the morgue
so i selfishly persued
"boohoo" there was nothing else for me to do i had to kill her
what a surprise
open your eyes
woman advisor
cmon yall know i had to kill her
cause theres lots which imposes divorces
send her ass right to the morgue
kill her
what a surprise
open your eyes
woman advisor
i had to kill her
cause theres lots which imposes divorces
send her ass right to the morgue
so you mean to tell me officer you dont have no clue who did this hit and run
no sir we dont have no clues right now
this is terrible what am i gonna tell the kids?
pull yourself together sir
im so broken up inside i just cant believe this
i understand, i understand
catch the person who did this
were gonna try sir
please
screamin "who done took my heart" like i was shooken up a lot
at the funeral though everyone was lookin at me odd like i did it
like i was the reason my mates slain murmuring
"i heard he was displeased with her weight gain"
while my secretary sort of a ***y blonde cant cook
all she does is order from restaurants
all of the *** she wants
i doubt could have dressed, clothes not washed proper and house look a mess and
talkin to detectives that was waitin outside
how i took a long lunch break day the wife died
i done then turned pail
and because of betrayal they indited me, gave me an impossible bail
good fortune to anyone admiring the rawtent
moral of the story is
desire is important
so watch your weight
itll keep you mate smitten its a given
though looking back i realised i didnt have to kill her
what a surprise
open your eyes
woman advisor
i didnt have to kill her
cause theres lots which imposes divorces
send her ass right to the morgue
i killed her
what a surprise
open your eyes
woman advisor
i didnt have to kill her
cause theres lots which imposes divorces
send her ass right to the morgue
well there you have it
keep thin trim
keep your mariage healthy
do you know what i mean?
small message from morcheeba and slick rick the ruler