I Will Be Absorbed

Half of the time I spend thinking alone
when I'm working out songs or just lying in the sun
The magical sound that I long to express
always just out of reach of my groping hands
Like the wanton muse
beckoning to me
vanishes before
I can see her face
How many times has a transient dawn's
beauty faded away before you understand
And a woman whose smile is a lingering song
brings tears to your eyes though you don't know why
Like a fragrant light
moves before your eyes
a million miles away
never to return
Wafting past from my childhood
Hazy thoughts and sensations
These must hold the key to my life
I always find those indefinite things
if I manage to touch them they turn into stone
and the quality that kept me following them
is only a sound that I knew all the time
If I ever find
what I'm looking for
I will be absorbed
and never write again