Johnny Jump Up

[Am]Ill tell you a story that happened to me
One [G]day as I went down to Youghal by the sea
The [Am]sun it was high and the day it was warm
Says I an auld [G]pint wouldnt [Em]do me no [Am]harm
I went in and I called for a bottle of stout
Says the barman Im sorry the beer is sold out
Try whiskey or Paddy ten years in the wood
Says I Ill try cider Ive heard that its good
O never O never O never again
If I live to a hundred or a hundred and ten
I fell to the floor and I couldnt get up
After drinking a pint of old Johnny Jump Up
After drinkin a quart I went out to the yard
Where I met up with Brophy the big local guard
Come here to me boy dont you know Im the law
So I jumped up on the counter and kissed him on the jaw
We fell to the floor and we couldnt get up
But it wasnt me kissed him twas the Johnny Jump Up
And the next thing I met down in Youghal by the sea
Was a poor man on crutches and says he to me
Im afraid of me life Ill get hit by a car
Would you help me across to the Railwaymans Bar?
After drinkin a pint of that cider so sweet
He threw down his crutches and danced round on his feet
A man died in the union by the name of McNab
They washed him and shaved him and laid him right out on the slab
And after the undertaker his measurements did take
His wife took him home to a very fine wake
It was about twelve oclock and the beer it was high
The corpse he sat up and says he with a sigh
I cant get into heaven for they wont let me up
Till I bring them a drink of old Johnny Jump Up
O never O never O never again
If I live to a hundred or a hundred and ten
For I fell to the floor and I couldnt get up
After drinking a pint of old Johnny Jump Up