Wonder If You Wonder

Know its been a long time, I hear youre doing just fine
時間良久，聽說你最近過的幸福美滿
Graduated, got a job and youve been working a grind
從畢業到工作，你從未放鬆自己
Youre never looking behind
時間朝前從不回頭
I know you never found me crossing your mind
我自知我已不會再浮現於你的腦海
But Id be lying if you didnt cross mine
可如果你從未出現在我的生命我也許還能欺騙自己
From time to time, I see some of your pictures online
自始至終，我在網絡上看著你分享的照片
'Kindest Regards' was hard, I left my heart on the line
也許難以真心待人，我只好隱藏自己的內心（Kindest Regards也為Witt Lowry的一首單曲）
I wrote a song for you, took a couple months of my time
花費數月時間，只為給你寫一首溫柔的歌
How can you praise him for flowers and a bottle of wine?
可你怎能因為鮮花美酒就對他讚賞有加
Youll never be mine, remember the time I came to see you?
你從不為我傾心，是否還記得那次看你時？
I thought it would just be you, but theres twelve other people
我滿心歡喜地盼望著你，可門後還藏著12個其他人
You see, there was never 'We', so we could never be a sequel
看吧你從來不說你和別人在一起，所以我和你永遠難成續集
Thought it mightve been a date that day, did anything to see you
我放下一切為了見你，只期盼一個浪漫約會
But Im nothing more than nothing, youre bluffing saying you care
可在你心裡我連空氣都不如，還欺騙我說你依然在意我
Our only real connection is memories that we share
你我之間只剩下曾經的記憶能維持聯繫
I would never try to blame you, cause blaming you isnt fair
可我從來沒想過怪你，因為這對你不公平
Not that you care, the stress is really starting to wear
可你仍然對我不屑一顧，不堪像枷鎖一般纏繞著我
And in my music, I took our story and I used it
我把它都寫進我的歌詞，讓音樂承載我們的過往
Dont care how you were feeling, I'm busy dropping my new ****
我也開始學著不去關心你的想法，忙著發布自己的新作品
Know people gonna love it, Im buzzing after I do it
我知道粉絲們會喜歡我的音樂，可我總感到腦袋嗡嗡作響
Im gifted with the curse of honesty and the truth is
事實如此，我天生就不會說謊
I loved you more than words, I didnt know how to prove it
我對你的愛溢於言表可我卻不知如何表達
Cant tell you that in person, but always could through my music
沒有當面告白的勇氣，只能在音樂中泰然自若
Everyone who said they cared isnt there, now Im confused
曾經對你表達關愛的人如今勞燕分飛
Im broken and bruised, lonely, open, empty, and stupid, and still I
我如今傷痕累累，孑然一身，內心空洞，腦袋遲鈍，可我依然...
I thought I had it all figured out
可我依然認為我能解決這一切紛亂
No, you would never fall for me now
但你從不為我傾心
I wonder if you wonder why Im never around
不知道你是否明白我不再陪伴你身旁
I wonder if you, I wonder if you wonder what Im doing right now
我亦不知你是否明白我的所作所為
You can hear the pain in my sound
也許你還能從我的聲音中聽出些許痛苦
Laughed as I fell to the ground
大笑著當我墜落於地
I wonder if you wonder why Im never around
不知道你是否明白我不再陪伴你身旁
I wonder if you, I wonder if you wonder what Im doing right now
我亦不知你是否明白我的所作所為
And I cant lie, it hurt a little when you said you didnt want me
我無法說謊，當你說你不需要我時真是令人傷心
To know I never tried is what continues to haunt me
指責我不勇敢嘗試的聲音一直縈繞著我
Every pic I see is you and him, his Twitter trying to taunt me
每一張照片都是你和他，他的Twitter甚至還試著嘲諷我
You think I let it go? This is old and exhausting
你覺得我還能輕易放下嗎？這些事真是又綿長又磨人
Some offspring, family in a house is what I thought about
我只是想要有一群可愛的孩子和一個溫暖的家庭
Sometimes I wonder if hell get that now
我有時懷疑他是否能給你這一切
See, we know that you picked a different path
現在世人皆知，你我分道揚鑣
Me, I picked a different route
我只好走回我的獨木橋
And I cant help but laugh at how this all played out
無法將自己從傷痛中抽離，當一切玩完時候我只好放聲大笑
Youre over me now, Im hoping you found only the best
你就想一顆流星劃過我的頭頂，如今只能祝福你找到幸福
Remember when we used to rap that Kanye West?
還記得當年我們跟著侃爺的歌饒舌
'Graduation' in rotation cause you liked that best
保持著《Graduation》循環因為這是你的摯愛（Graduation為kanye的一張專輯，同時與前面graduated呼應）
And back then I didnt want you, now look, Im a mess
那時我們年輕懵懂，如今看來我已經一團糟
I open my chest and through me you can see no spine
我挺起胸膛面對一切，你能看到在我身後空無一人
My profile pic and lyrics Ive been hiding behind
我隱藏我的個人資料和歌詞
It looks like you found the love that I was hoping to find
羨慕你找到了我一直苦苦尋找的真愛
The only you I loves the one that I create in my mind, and still I
我對你的愛戀只是我腦海中的一個幻想，可我依然...
I thought I had it all figured out
我依然以為我已經弄清楚一切
No, you would never fall for me now
可你從不為我傾心
I wonder if you wonder why Im never around
不知道你是否明白我不再陪伴你身旁
I wonder if you, I wonder if you wonder what Im doing right now
我亦不知你是否明白我的所作所為
You can hear the pain in my sound
也許你還能從我的聲音中聽出些許痛苦
Laughed as I fell to the ground
大笑著當我墜落於地
I wonder if you wonder why Im never around
不知道你是否明白我不再陪伴你身旁
I wonder if you, I wonder if you wonder what Im doing right now
我亦不知你是否明白我的所作所為
I thought I had it all figured out
我以為我能解決這一切紛擾
No, you would never fall for me now
可你從不為我傾心
I wonder if you wonder why Im never around
不知道你是否明白我不再陪伴你身旁
I wonder if you, I wonder if you wonder what Im doing right now
我亦不知你是否明白我的所作所為
You can hear the pain in my sound
也許你還能從我的聲音中聽出些許痛苦
Laughed as I fell to the ground
大笑著當我墜落於地
I wonder if you wonder why Im never around
不知道你是否明白我不再陪伴你身旁
I wonder if you, I wonder if you wonder what Im doing right now
我亦不知你是否明白我的所作所為
I often wonder if you ever did care
我總是茫然你是否真正關心過我
I wonder why in my mind is the only time you ever were there
我不知道我的腦海中為何自始至終只有你一人
See, we were friends, but that felt more like pretend
看吧我們曾是好友，儘管那看起來更像是虛張聲勢
This year is awfully clear, the real us is what I fear
這是糟糕的一年，一切都清楚明白，我對我們之間的一切恐懼都浮於水面
The one where we were only friends and I acted like we dated
曾經的我們是摯友還能讓我滿足些許愛慕之情
And nowadays our conversation is, 'Hey, happy belated'
如今一切都已過去我們只剩下說：“嘿，遲來的幸福”
And every song I wrote for you, you know you actually hate it
我都清楚你對我曾經寫給你的歌感到厭惡
Because you realize that you never felt the same when you played it
因為你從來不能感受到被別人玩弄時是如何的絕望
You never cared if I made it, thats why I waited, you know me
你也從不在意我是否有所起色，那也正式我苦苦等候的原因，你知道的
See, all the love that Ive been getting through my phone feels phony
看吧，我能從手機上得到的喜愛都是虛無縹緲的
I rhyme a couple words together, every girl want to blow me
我隨便壓上幾個韻女孩們就能把我吹成神仙
Were in a world full of people, yet Im feeling so lonely
我們都生活在充滿人類的世界，卻只有我還時常感到孤獨
If only I couldtell myself theres plenty fish in the sea
我還能欺騙自己有許多魚游弋海洋之中
But see, the sea if full of sharks, fake guppies, and greed
可海洋中滿是吃人鯊魚，虛偽孔雀魚以及無盡的貪婪
And as I find myself drowning while Im fighting to breathe
當我在夾縫中生存掙扎著呼吸時，我卻發現我正在被水淹沒
I realize that Im in love with what I thought we could be
直到此時我才明白我心中虛無縹緲的愛戀只是我的一廂情願罷了