conspiracy

I beat myself up
For letting you down
Wish things had gone my way
Ive counted my blessings
Not sure what Im missing
Too young to be tired of change
Did I miss a beat
Of this conspiracy
Im done with digging all the dirt
Denials my disease
This plot I made believe
Keep hitting me where it hurts
Why do I keep on trying to fix what aint broken
Ill bend us to break just so I can feel some emotion
And all I ever wanted was a sweet distraction
But you stayed long enough to turn into my only obsession
Pinning shadows down
I get worse when it gets darker
The light is too bright
Im exhausted by the colours of you
Of your golden hue
Leave the bulb alone and
Let the flower bloom
Keep my sticks and stones
Dont trip over the fuse but I do
Because of you
Did I miss a beat
Of this conspiracy
Im done with digging all the dirt
Denials my disease
This plot I made believe
Keep hitting me where it hurts
Why do I keep on trying to fix what aint broken
Ill bend us to break just so I can feel some emotion
And all I ever wanted was a sweet distraction
But you stayed long enough to turn into my only obsession